He survived the glare of the world's media at his sister's funeral, delivered one of the most talked-about eulogies in modern history, and has spent decades in the public eye — but it was a single remark from Princess Anne that left Charles Spencer truly lost for words.
In his explosive new memoir, Swan Song: Diana My Sister, the 9th Earl Spencer recalls a formal dinner at Buckingham Palace in the days leading up to Charles and Princess Diana's wedding in 1981 — and one encounter that, more than four decades on, has clearly stayed with him.
A Teenage Spencer Meets His Match
The Earl was just 17 at the time, seated next to the Princess Royal at the pre-wedding banquet. Trying to make polite conversation, he asked Anne how the christening of her daughter Zara Tindall had gone — a subject he assumed would be a safe and cheerful opener.
He was wrong.
"I expected her to run away with the happy topic of her baby Zara's baptism. But instead, she stopped, looked at me witheringly, and asked, 'Tell me, how's a christening supposed to go?'"
Spencer writes that he could not reply, recalling that he simply "turned red and looked at my plate". He cast an envious glance across the room at his brother-in-law Neil, who was having a rather more pleasant evening chatting beside the Crown Princess of Japan.
Reflecting on the evening, the Earl wrote: "It was the luck of the draw that night, whether you were placed next to a royal who was happy to make you feel small, or one that had the grace and manners to look for common ground, wherever it might be found."
A More Complicated Picture
The anecdote will raise eyebrows, though those who know the Princess Royal well may not be entirely surprised. Princess Anne is widely regarded as the hardest-working member of the Royal Family and is celebrated for her no-nonsense, unstuffy manner — qualities that, depending on where you're sitting at a state banquet, can either be enormously refreshing or rather alarming.
HELLO! royal editor Emily Nash has noted that Anne "famously abhors fuss of any kind", preferring to go about her work without a press pack in tow. Nash draws a direct comparison to her late father, Prince Philip, in her down-to-earth approach to royal life.
That directness was on full display last week when Anne met England rugby union coach Sir Kevin Sinfield during his gruelling 7 in 7 ultra-marathon challenge, remarking that she herself would "stick to horses" — a quip that delighted onlookers. She has also recently attended the funeral of King Harald V alongside Prince William, ahead of an official visit to Norway.
Away from the formal engagements, those close to the Princess Royal paint a warmer picture. A well-placed source previously told HELLO!: "She is an amazing mother and grandmother and has a natural talent for putting people at ease, much like her mother, the late Queen." Anne is said to be a hands-on presence in the lives of her grandchildren, including Peter Phillips' daughters Savannah and Isla, and Zara Tindall's three children, Mia, Lena and Lucas.
Spencer's Bombshell Book
The Buckingham Palace dinner anecdote is just one of several revelations to emerge from Swan Song, which has already generated significant attention since its release. The memoir centres on Spencer's close relationship with his sister Diana and the aftermath of her death in 1997, and includes fresh detail about the famous eulogy he delivered at her funeral.
"She was gracious enough to say that it was his sister's funeral, he could say what he wanted, and I thought that was remarkably good of her."
That was Spencer — speaking in a conversation with Tina Brown — recounting the late Queen Elizabeth II's reaction to his fiery speech, at a time when other members of the Royal Family were reportedly "incandescent" with fury at his words. It is, by any measure, a book full of scores quietly settled and memories long kept private now brought sharply into the light.
As for Princess Anne — she is, as ever, getting on with things. She is due to visit south Essex later this month, attending a Learning Together workshop at Shaftesbury Dolphin Court in Thorpe Bay and opening a new housing development in Mayland on 19th October. One suspects she will not be inviting questions about how the ribbon-cutting is "supposed to go".